His friend in Tangier tells him the city's no longer safe to cross from. Too many police. It's famous now. Further along the coast it should be easier, less security. We should go to Tetouan or further east to Hociema. Abdullah says we'll leave tomorrow. Always asks if I'm going with him. Every time he moves to another town, he asks if I'm coming with him. At first I think I don't want to go. I wasn't prepared for this. I expected to spend weeks in Tangier looking for someone, wasting time. Tangier is just becoming familiar to me now and the room is getting cleaner.

If I want to tell his story, I have to follow him. We have no idea where we're going, never been to Tatouan before. He says again he's worried it's going to get dangerous for me. I tell him to stop being patronising. I'm not worried at all. But the fact that Abdullah is concerned makes me wonder for a moment if he's just overreacting, or if this is more serious than I expected. It makes me think maybe I don't know enough about what I'm getting into.

The thought doesn't leave me: I'm doing this for fun. I'm doing this to make a film and tell a story. Abdullah doesn't have the same choice. There's also excitement. I keep waiting for something to happen- but it's happening. We're both in the middle- this is an amazing sensation, I'm not just watching but I'm involved. Abdullah, understandably, still doesn't trust me- he asks again if we really are friends, what ties us? "How can we tell we should trust each other?" he asks. He asks if he's just someone I met on the balcony who fit into my story. I'm honest with him, I tell him we don't know each other. If he doesn't trust me he shouldn't agree to let me come with him.

Maybe I should be more brutal, tell him now that he really is just a story and I don't care about him. Is that what a journalist would say? It's not entirely true in my case. I can't try to tell his story without sympathy, even if I wanted to. The purpose of the film, I explain, is to tell people in Britain what happens here. Maybe this is something noble I should be proud of. Maybe it's just an excuse to do something adventurous. If he disappeared, I don't know how I'd feel.

I know if I felt in danger, I would leave and I couldn't take Abdullah with me. But in the end he always asked what was more important, the film or him. He's alive, I said, of course a person's life is more important that the film.

I don't know at what point it becomes too close and I can't make a documentary anymore, I can't be objective any more. There comes a point when I can't be a journalist any more if I'm involved. But I never wanted it to be merely objective- it was always supposed to have my voice.

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